The Art of Asking for Valuable Feedback

The Art of Asking for Valuable Feedback

Normally, I agree with RuPaul, “what other people think of me is none of my business”. The fact is, you will never please everyone so be yourself.  With that said, as you move toward being your highest and best self, checking in with others can shine a light on your blind spots.  

Don’t be scared. Feedback doesn’t have to feel like a year end performance review by a frazzled boss, if you choose your truth tellers wisely. Pick a few trusted people in your life that have your best interests and wellbeing at heart.  Let them know that you value their perspective and welcome their feedback even if it is going to be uncomfortable.

While I recommend staying open to feedback no matter where it comes from, I realize that it takes extra energy to receive it with another’s viewpoint in mind. You can avoid wasting time and energy for everyone if you request it thoughtfully.

Here are a few ways to get valuable, easy to consume feedback from anyone:

  • Start with your strengths- People are happy to give you positive feedback especially if you ask them specifically for just that.  There are no minefields to navigate or stress for them about how to tell you about your weaknesses.  
  • Be specific when it comes to weaknesses- Target your requests about areas you want to develop. Time management? Organization skills? Communication? Technical expertise? You want to receive information that will make a difference so narrow it down for them.  

An outsider can see what you can’t, so ask for feedback frequently. With a little preparation you can make it simple and useful. Clarity will help you leverage your strengths and improve areas that are holding you back.

Spoiler alert- When you get good at asking for feedback and making meaningful changes, more people will come to you for feedback too. Don’t forget to clarify their requests with this framework so you can help them- Quick, easy, and without the drama!